Suggestion #20: Tell them specifically what you want them to do, avoid the negative.
As I have mentioned before, communicating with an autistic child is extremely important, and they often process information differently than we do. If a child is standing on a chair and you don’t want them to do that, saying “don’t do that!” may not help. When you say not to do something, they have to try and think of what exactly it is that you want them to do, and what is it that you are asking them not to? Instead, say “please sit on the chair with your butt touching the chair and your feet on the floor.” Now you have told them exactly what you want them to do, there is no ambiguity. Use clean, concise requests. Also, try to avoid using figures off speech, hyperbole, or exaggerating. Once I told my son, after he ran onto my bed without asking, that he was to get “every speck of dirt out of my bed;” so he brushed the bed once with his hand, and then broke down crying. He quickly realized that getting every speck of dirt out was impossible. He sat and cried for 20 minutes before I could explain that I wanted him to get “as much dirt out as possible.” He then finished brushing the bed.
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"In the end, only kindness matters."
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